When you're dealing with a name like Fudge Van Hooser, the headline doesn't need to say anything else. That's an actual college football player's name. Well, okay, maybe his christian name isn't "Fudge," but that's what's listed everywhere.
Fudge Van Hooser committed to play for Tulane (and reportedly had interest from Purdue), and my only regret about this is that he's not going to a Big Ten school where I can make fun of his name for the next four years like the juvenile dumbass that I am. I would have even been fine with him at Purdue because it would have made for endlessly entertaining (to us, anyway) headlines and t-shirt opportunities.
The guilty party in this case is