I Hope Big Brown Does This On Saturday

Horse Inner Monologue: Okay, here we are... the race is about to start. Man, those oats were good a little while ago. If only I could get this fu-king leprauchaun off my back, I'd be all good. Wait, what am I doing being shoved into this tiny enclosure? Shit! They just closed the gate behind me! Man, I am crammed in here. Hey, don't you assholes remember I'm claustrophobic? Dammit.

What's all that crowd noise? Wait, something's about to happen, I can tell.... wheee! The gate's open and we're off! Hey, there's Bill! And Hank! And Joe! Hey, guys where are you all going? I guess I better go, too.

*pant pant*

Hey, fellas where the hell are we all going in such a GD hurry? Hey! Can't you hear me? Let me get a little closer to you.

*bumps other horse*

Hey. HEY! Mother-effer! Can't you hear me?

I'm just want to know --- wait, what are THOSE? Holy crap! Candy apples on the infield! Lemme attem!!!!!

Is There Anything Redeeming About The NBA Finals?

One Big Arse Storm

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