News Bulletin: Fat Charlie Remains Classy

Charlie Weis, the most sanctimonious prick working in college football today (and remember, that's a prick-filled club) continued his completely intolerable -- and, frankly, unjustified -- arrogance in his media day press conference at the Dame of Notre last week.

Leaving aside his many 150-words-where-25-will-do answers that really say nothing, we'll just look at Fat Charlie's answers when asked about the very legitimate issue of his "star" QB's potential underage drinking...

REPORTER: Your thoughts on the pictures that appeared online earlier this week and what happens from here?

COACH WEIS: I'm going to answer that in two sentences. First of all, I think the obvious thing, on a serious note, I think it's important that I don't condone underage drinking. I think that's important to say. But that being said and no sarcastic moment really meant to be, but give me a break. Let's move on on.

Well, that's five sentences. And you didn't really answer it. So you don't condone underage drinking, but your answer when asked about your underage quarterback (among others) drinking is.... "give me a break"? Why don't more people call this jerk-off out? This is ridiculous.

REPORTER: Well, let me ask you this --

COACH WEIS: Let's move on.

Ah, nooo... see, fat boy, you're responsible for answering questions at a press conference. In fact, I'm willing to bet it's in your contract.

REPORTER: I'm going to ask you this question anyway. The players, let's face it, they are underage and they pose for a picture in a situation that allegedly is questionable. They were in a position where they were allegedly drinking. Your thoughts on that?

COACH WEIS: Alleged by who?

REPORTER: The website said they were participating in something called the Beer Olympics.

COACH WEIS: I said let's give them a break and let's move on. That's as far as I'm going to say. I'm not going to take it any further than that.

Oh, you said to give them a break. Well, no actually, you said "Give me a break" in the dismissive, get-a-life, I'm-trying-to-make-you-feel-silly-for-asking-that-question way. Nice try, though.

REPORTER: Not going to be any discipline?

COACH WEIS: Let's move on on.

Honestly, yes, we think this guy's a joke. But more seriously, how far can he go? How far should he be ALLOWED to go? Sometimes -- wrongly -- coaches in major college sports are allowed a lot more rope than they should get. And those are usually guys who manage to win and thus make the school a lot of money. I don't think The Big Manatee has cost ND any money yet (see their big NBC contract renewal) but he's not really all that successful, either. Especially by their fantasyland "standards."

But yeah, by all means, keep being a complete dilweed, Charlie. You're just like Bill Belichick, whom you clearly learned this garbage from... just like him, except, you know, for the championships as a head coach.


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